I am going to refer to today as "The Day of the Massive Stomach Ache." All day I was thinking about last night and everything that happened, and feeling terrible. I did not talk to Jenn at all, even though I wanted to text her so bad. I feel like that would just make things worse.
This morning I woke up to my Mom making me pancakes, which was wonderful. We went out to Ponte Vedra with Liam for the day, and met up with my grandmother and my cousin Patrick at my aunt's house. We pretty much just sat around and talked, and I had a really long talk with Granny Franny about Sweet Briar. I have decided (more like accepted) that I am miserable there. I realized today when I was talking to Granny about it, that it is a good fit academically, just not socially. I am not going to transfer, but I have been thinking a lot more about graduate school. Working at the hospital this summer will be good, because if it turns out to be something I enjoy, it would be a field I could easily go into right out of school. I want/need to get an MBA, although I will get my Masters and Doctorate in Art History before I am 50. That is my ultimate goal in life. How cool would it be to have a doctorate in Contemporary Art? That is what I would love to do. I love my grandmother so much, and talking to her makes me realize things and sort my thoughts.
We went to the Town Center for lunch and shopping. At Barnes and Noble I got my favorite magazines ever, as well as a new one called FOUND that I uh.... found. I haven’t really looked at it yet but it looks pretty cool. I will be up all night tonight reading that, Artforum, and Art on Paper.
For my birthday my mom got me a gift card to get a new iPhone since mine is a piece of crap and falling apart. Although when I went in my friends there told me to wait a while before I get a new one since there may be a new phone coming out this summer. So me and my good friend Cherry Darling will be sticking together for a bit longer. I guess that’s good, because I still hadn’t thought of a new name for my new phone. My phone now is Cherry Darling (Planet Terror), my Kindle is Dr. Dakota Block (also Planet Terror) and my iPod is Frankenstein. So I will think about that for a while.
I spent some time with Rob tonight, and it was different than it has been for a while. I think a lot about my senior year and how Rob and I spent every moment together, and I really miss that. And tonight it didn't feel forced like it does sometimes. We about peed ourselves when lightning hit right by his house right before we were going to go to the Loop for dinner. (I just realized I left my cup in my car and I am really thirsty....) I got my food and as always, the first thing he did was take a huge bite out of one of my chicken fingers. Although this time it scalded his mouth and the chicken along with a line of slobber fell from his mouth. Just as it happened a women walked in the door and watched the whole thing happen. She just shook her head and laughed, which made the whole situation about a thousand times funnier. After dinner our first thought was "Krispy Kreme," of course. We then discovered the hot sign is on until 10 now, which was thrilling.
After I left Rob's I went to the beach and hung out with Jason for a little bit. It was rainy and gross and the only thing we could figure out to do was to walk on the beach for a while. I felt bad because he has a broken toe and the sand was wet and hard to walk on, but he was a good sport about it. I wasn’t out there very long, and I was driving back home I realized that I hadn’t seen Emma yet, so I called her and met her at the Casbah with two of her friends. That sentence was unnecessarily long. I was there with her for about an hour and I think I am going to do something with her tomorrow.
In the last few days, I have realized something really odd about myself. I guess I realized it a long time ago, but it has been confirmed. I am an observer. In any given situation, I would much rather observe than partake. Like the other night at TSI, I would rather people watch than dance or socialize. I think this is the main thing that makes me so socially awkward. I am fine with that though. It may be part of my creative and artsy side that makes me do it, because I like to image these people’s lives and what they will do when they go home. I wish I could be invisible. I would go out so much and just watch people, never partaking in any of the activities, just observe. I don’t feel like this is creepy in the least bit, because I am not staring and watching, just observing and noting things. Alright that is even creepier.
Overall I had a decent day, but I had this nagging stomach ache all day, thinking about last night. No matter what I was doing, or how hard I was laughing at Rob in pain, I could not get last night out of my head. I have to fix this. I have a phone conference tomorrow morning at 9:30 (I feel so grown up) so I am going to get to sleep. No plans other than that tomorrow for the most part.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment